51 Days in Kiwi-Land

We have spent longer here in New Zealand than any other place on this or other trips we have taken in the past. We have visited both islands, 12 of the 13 districts into which the country is divided, innumerable national parks and forests and all of the largest cities. The reasons for spending all this time exploring New Zealand? It is so damn far away from the United States and everywhere else, when will we ever get back? Also, Joe especially was so amped about our visit here, for all the different wilderness and outdoors activities available here. I had visited here once before, 9 years ago, for just 2 weeks, by myself and on a tight budget. This trip was different. We had time. And I had a wonderful companion, who asked me 10 times a day, "how sick is this?" After seeing yet, again, the most beautiful beach we'd ever seen the other day, Joe told me in all seriousness, "I feel bad for Kiwis (a very common way of referring to New Zealanders)." "Why, honey?" "Because every other place they ever visit is just going to pale in comparison to New Zealand." That pretty much sums it up. Following are some Kiwi themes that I want to describe further.

DOC, the beloved Department of Conservation- If we ever win the lottery, or otherwise become wealthy, the New Zealand Department of Conservation is going to get a very large donation from Erica and Joe. 1/3 of this country is preserved in public lands: national parks, forests, and scenic reserves. New Zealand is about the size of Colorado, but it is far more diverse. The density of gorgeous spots and pristine nature is unlike anywhere else. And it is so comforting to know that a responsible public entity like DOC is the caretaker of New Zealand's natural resources, and is doing such a damn good job of preserving them for Kiwis and visitors alike. Throughout the country, the DOC signs are dark green, with bright yellow lettering. Just the sight of them made us happy, because we knew we were about to enter some beautiful place and probably find a very well-run campsite there for us to spend the night.


Flora, Fauna and other Natural Wonders- We have seen some of the largest trees in the world, climbed giant sand dunes that made us think of the Middle East, seen many of the most beautiful beaches we've ever seen, walked up to a glacier, and I spotted a kiwi (a rare, nearly extinct, nocturnal, hairy flightless bird native to New Zealand). New Zealand is different to anyplace else on Earth; these volcanic islands separated from mainland Asia a very long time ago, thus the flora and fauna found here evolved very distinctly. New Zealand did not have any land mammals before the Europeans (accidentally) introduced rats, stoats and possums. Having no natural predators, these animals reproduce at an amazing rate and cause mass destruction in New Zealand's vulnerable environment. Several strange flightless birds have already become extinct, and the funny kiwi bird, the national icon, is nearly there, too. We met New Zealanders who had spent "a lot of time in the bush" and had never seen a kiwi. Yet, the one night Joe and I spent in kiwi habitat, we went for a night walk to try and see one and I spotted the little critter. So funnny looking! Long skinny, orange beak, twiggy legs, shaggy fur, running around in the forest's undergrowth.

"Staying at the Pub" s - Every town in New Zealand has a pub. Even if there are only 5 houses in the town, there will be a pub. And most of these pubs are also hotels; that is actually what they are called. Early on in our stay here, we found that these pub/hotels offer very reasonably-priced accomodation in quaint and historic buildings. And there's a pub downstairs! The patrons are generally older men and they are usually watching some sort of sport I don't understand: cricket or rugby, but the vibe is laid-back and friendly, like everywhere in New Zealand.

Weather - The weather makes or breaks a trip to New Zealand. When the sun is shining here, the ocean is magnificent blues and aquas, the stars are bright and plentiful, and hiking and camping and eating outside is a joy. When it is cold and rainy and windy, you feel like you will never warm up and never dry out. Our last two weeks here on the North Island have been fabulously "fine" (how they describe nice weather), but prior to that, we had the bad luck of following very bad weather around. It was miserable to camp, but we still tried to as much as possible, to keep our costs down. Because the geography of New Zealand is very compact and changes a lot, it might be very sunny and dry just 100 kms away from where we were camping, but we didn't know it! We were just holed up in our sopping tent.

Radio as a portal into Kiwi culture - We spent a lot of time in the car over the past 51 days. Our MP3 player has too few songs that we have heard too many times over the past 9 months, so we were captive to Kiwi radio much of the day.Radio New Zealand, particularly from 8-12 in the morning was our saving grace. The Kiwi version of NPR or the BBC packed in wonderful news and conversations about life and current events in New Zealand and the world. They read us stories, played us good (and bad music) and introduced us to Kiwi perspectives on a range of things from astro-physics to homosexuality in India and the current policies of the Chinese Reserve Bank. Unfortunately, when our favorite program host on Radio New Zealand came in fuzzy or was off the air, we had to root around for other things to listen to on the radio. This generally lead us to much less salubrious talk radio, which generally left us with our mouths open: "did he really just say that?" I am sure that a visitor to the U.S. would have the same reactions to much of the talk radio on our airwaves, but, damn, the things we heard expressed! That all religions (aside from some Protestants) are cults, that the "feral underclass" of New Zealand should be prevented from having children via operations, and that domestic violence is very common household problem here and people talk about (admit to it) quite freely. Listening to these very different kinds of radio made us think that Kiwis were astute and worldly in the morning and dumb and ignorant in the afternoons.

Produce - We have eaten some of the best produce of our lives here in New Zealand. The best avocados, apples, feta cheese, mussels, and oysters I have ever tasted are abundant and inexpensive in New Zealand. What a joy! Seafood chowder, Pinot Noirs and Sauvignon Blancs are sources of national pride. These items made cooking over a camp stove most nights quite all right.

Camper Vans - Nearly every tourist who comes to New Zealand rents a camper van and drives around the country. Thus, they are protected from the weather and are saved the misery of setting up a tent in the rain. They also fit in wonderfully to a thorough camper van culture alive here in New Zealand. Kiwis travel around their country in large vehicles: busses, vans, and trailers, all outfitted to live in comfortably for a week or a year. And we met many older Kiwi couples who did exactly that in retirement: lived in their camper or trailer in a national park or holiday park (camper van cities) for a season or more. We felt like morons, on occasion, with our small-sized vehicle and an orange tent as our home, especially when we saw other people dry in their campers, enjoying a cup of hot tea when it was squalling outside.

Maori - Thee original inhabitants of these islands were treated perhaps nearly as badly as those of Australia or the Americas by the British colonizers. Their land was taken from them for absurd prices, then exploited for all of its precious resources, guns and diseases were introduced to the detrminent of the Maori. Yet, Maori culture is alive and well in New Zealand. It is incorporated into the psyche of the country. Te Papa, the National Museum, in Wellington, the capital, is mostly a history and monument to the Maori and their culture. After all, the Maori were here for 800 years before Europeans were. And they came here in giant big canoes from Pacific islands like Hawaii! New Zealand, unlike any other Western nation that nearly destroyed its indigenous, has attempted to make reparations for past wrongs to the Maori. Lands and rights to resources taken from them under the Treaty of Waitangi (the document that "legalized" Queen Victoria's government domination of New Zealand and its inhabitants) have been returned to Maori tribes. Maoris are still poorer, on average, than other Zealanders and the places where they are the majority of the population, like the Eastern Cape of the North Island, are obviously more economically depressed than other parts of New Zealand. Maoris use cool Pacific/Polynesian designs, sometimes tatoo their faces and have a very wordy and syllabic language. Maori words and names are often printed next to their English equivalent throughout the country. Our favorite bit of Maori language is that "Wh" is pronounced "F". And there are "Wh's" all over New Zealand. Our favorite place name is "Whakapapa." Don't forget the "F" sound. We like to say it a few times a day, at least.